Clear Your Schedule, This Could Take Awhile.

A terrible relationship according to Adele's album "21":

1. You played me. I'm going to ruin your life. (Rolling in the Deep)
2. You met someone new? Fabulous. You want me back? Even better. You want to try your own medicine? No? Oops! Too late! (Rumour Has It)
3. I'm tired of your abusive crap and can stand up for myself. (Turning Tables)
4. Just kidding. (Don't You Remember)
5. No really. You're a manipulative jerk and we're through. I think. (Set Fire to the Rain)
6. We can work this out if we try, I know we can. (He Won't Go)
7. I gave you everything. Leave me alone. (Take it All)
8. It's my fault, I can love you better, I promise. (I'll Be Waiting)
9. Double dare you to try again...please? (One and Only)
10. I'll love you forever. (Lovesong - A Bekah-approved Cure cover)
11. Clearly you've moved on, so I'll stalk you and find your doppelganger to fall in love with. (Someone Like You)

Tired of clicking and watching videos? Well, don't say I didn't warn you of the time-consuming nature of this post.

21 is a great album. It took some getting used to, but over the summer I slowly began to like it, bit by bit. We were staying in Rosemead, CA at the time. I was working in Santa Monica and had a glorious commute of anywhere between 45 minutes to 2 hours (everything you've heard about LA traffic is true). For once I'm not sarcastically exaggerating my adjectives. It truly was glorious. I had all that time alone. Alone time was unheard of when I was married. To bring it up was like saying "God" in a house full of athiests. So to have all that time by myself was awesome. I could listen to whatever I wanted, at whatever volume I wanted. I listened to Adele. Loudly. I learned all the words to my favorite songs and tried not to dwell on the fact that I was living some of that story. I think the first time I listened to "Turning Tables" all the way through I cried. "Take it All" was hard to listen to as well. "Turning Tables" was hard because that's what I wanted to say but couldn't. "Take it All" hurt because I was doing my best but it didn't matter. Actually, all of the songs have one element or another in common with the farce I call my marriage. So why was I listening (read: rocking out) to it today when I was cleaning?

Because I like it. I like it despite the hell I was living in. I like it because I really enjoyed my drives to work. I like it because it serves as a reminder of what not to do. I like it because there are "oh, silly girl" moments and "you poor thing" moments and "hey I know what that feels like" moments.

If you've read my "About Me" page, you know that I think music takes all the emotion in. One of these days, I'll get to dance it out.

Well, at least somewhere that isn't my dirty bathroom.